2nd Birthday and Punkin' Pickin'

Well, Sweetiepie turned 2 on September 8. She slept through her party (it was her party and her sister's since they share a birthday 4 years apart on the same day - yes, by chance), but ate her cake afterwards.

We visited the local pumpkin patch on October 4 to celebrate the Chinese Moon Festival and Lantern Festival. There must have been more than 150 people there for the event. It was wonderful. Both Sweetiepie and Cheerful Phoenix had a great time. I think Cheerful Phoenix had a better time, though. Sweetiepie is not only going through the "terrible two's," but also she continues to deal with her speech delays and sensory integration disorder. She throws terrible tantrums at times, hits herself, and screams as loud as she can. She pulls her sister's hair and hits her very hard.

I know some of these things are from just being two, but I think the majority have to deal with her ability to cope with change, lack of language skills, and frustration. The hardest thing to understand is that she will scream when she seems to be happy as loud as she can...I just don't understand it. It's very hard to see the majority of families who adopt from China NOT having to deal with tough transitions when you are going through it with your child. I am happy for them, but jealous at the same time.

Did I know this could happen? Absolutely. Did I realize about "institutional autism" or other extreme issues that are so hard to overcome? Yes and no...I think I thought it wouldn't be as hard to deal with or that therapists would have all the answers. Sweetiepie often confuses them with her behaviors as much as she d0es us! For anyone reading this blog who is about to bring home a SN child from China - young age DOES NOT mean you will have fewer transition or institutionalization issues. Unfortunately, I think coming from an extremely difficult start with VERY LITTLE stimulation can be extremely damaging to certain children no matter WHAT their age.

Poyang evidently has favorite children and kids that are not given the care they need. I am POSITIVE Sweetiepie did not receive even adequate care or support there. I know that some children do. I can only hope and pray that all children will eventually receive the care they need there. Come on, Half the Sky, build a center in Poyang!

But, Sweetiepie is happy. Teething has been a breeze compared to what it was with Cheerful Phoenix. The two of them are complete opposites in personality but they adore each other. Cheerful Phoenix is like a second mother to Sweetiepie. We have a fabulous babysitter who is fluent in sign language and is teaching Amy to use it. We are blessed. She has truly completed our family and we couldn't love her more!

It's been one year since Sweetiepie's referral!

It was one year ago today, June 14, that we opened our email and opened our hearts to our Bo Lu (Sweetiepie). We received her referral on Saturday, June 14 and sent in our LOI by nightfall. She is now taking 6 steps at a time and will sleep for the first time in her sister's (they will be sharing) room tonight. Boy! It's amazing how much can change in one year! :)

Update on the home front...

Well, you can see that things are going rather smoothly these days. Just in the past couple of weeks Sweetiepie has learned my favorite word, "Momma". So what if Daddy is called "Momma," too? She'll figure that all out eventually. :) Sweetiepie is picking up new words every few days - today she learned to say "cracker" for one of her favorite foods - graham crackers.

Sweetiepie is very close to standing on her own. She refuses to pull up on anything and hasn't yet crawled (she scoots upright on her bottom), but she is very determined. She squatted down and raised her arms tonight - if she had just pushed up she would have been standing - I bet she will do that this week. :)

I can't believe she is now about 20 lbs and wearing either 12 or (as pictured) 18 month clothes. Her hair is getting longer and her personality is finally starting to really break through. She still has her obsession with hair, and if I can make it through her toddler years w/out bald spots to go along with the gray hairs I cover I will be doing well!

We are so happy with our babysitter and she has gotten Sweetiepie to wear her glasses with very little complaint virtually all day (not during naps, of course). It is very obvious that she can see much better with them. She likes to lift them up and put them back down over her eyes and laugh - I think she must think it's funny to see something clearly then not then see it again.

Sweetiepie is feeding herself smaller foods, too! Pasta, Cheerios, and similar items - it takes her a long time, but she does it. She absolutely loves toys with mirrors and enjoys watching herself chew or make funny faces. She loves to play with spoons and cups and knows just where she leaves her favorite toys. She is exploring the house (as fast as she can scoot) and I think she finally feels like this is home. Her least favorite things are putting on shoes and socks and diaper changes.

We have decided to not do anything more regarding her eyes until she is around four years old. As I've posted before - no heart surgery! We are very happy with how things are progressing!

Sweetiepie is making progress...

I'm sorry I have failed to update everyone. Life has been kind of crazy with two kids to take care of and a full time job - but I know tons of you out there do it with ease and I can only aspire to match your parenting skills.

I am happy to say that Sweetiepie's VSD is 75% healed - no surgery is anticipated and she will just need annual scans and a checkup with the cardiologist until she is about 13 or so.

I've been very upset off and on since seeing the interational adoption specialist around mid-February. Sweetiepie is very developmentally behind, was tested for DiGeorge's Syndrome (Google that and get your pants scared off!), and showed signs of "institutional autism". Institutional autism is a fairly new term coined by neurologists working w/kids who are internationally adopted and have lived in orphanages. The kids show some symptoms of autism - such as repetative movements, developmentally behind, little interaction with people, etc.

To be fair, the IA specialist never said the words "institutional autism", but I found out about it on the Internet after the visit and while waiting to see if Sweetiepie had DiGeorge's Syndrome. Luckily, she DOES NOT have DiGeorge's Syndrome. I don't think there is a scarier word for a parent than autism unless it would be cancer. I've been terribly afriad that Sweetiepie really had autism - not just the symptoms.

Happily, I can now report that after Amy started therapy with First Steps (OT, DI, & PT) one of the therpists said she does not think Amy has the real autism and my husband and I don't think so now, either. Is she behind? Absolutely! Is she showing signs of learning? You bet! She knows about 6 English words already, finally is starting to know her name, is inventing games for herself, is interacting with adults (quite the social butterfly compared to her sister at the same age), etc.

Sweetiepie does need glasses - I just ordered those and they should arrive next week. We hope it will help her overcome her infantile esotropia (crossed eyes), but anticipate one or several surgeries to correct that in her future. For all those people out there waiting to go get their SN child in China - this was a completely unanticipated SN we encountered with Sweetiepie - the SWI knew about it but purposely never told us. They seemed to know she was showing signs of institutional autism, but I can't prove that.

My advice to you adoptive parents waiting to travel is expect the unexpected! I went to China like a kid goes to Disneyworld...I anticipated we had been told the truth...I've held China and its people on an untouchable pedestal since before we brought home Cheerful Phoenix - a pedestal that no real person could ever stay upon. The SWI lied...they made mistakes...I'm sure I did, too, on the trip. I should have thought of the people of China as real people - not perfection. None of us are certainly perfect. That was my mistake and unfair to them. I'll try to stay off of my soap box about my anger with Poyang SWI, but if you want more details you can email me.

Anyway, Sweetiepie is improving daily. She is a very happy baby and she loves us and we love her. She is as different from her sister as daylight and dark, but Cheerful Phoenix adores Sweetiepie. We are finally on a schedule (for the most part) w/Sweetiepie and she is staying with a great babysitter. Sweetiepie has therapy twice a week and that just started last week. I hope to post about the progress she makes soon.

Home again! (Returned on 1/23 midnight)

I'm home w/my big sister and Mom and Dad, now. Boy, what a trip! We all have bad colds and have been trying to get dejetlaggted this past week. I'm sleeping on Eastern Time now, but I won't eat much except bananas, graham crackers and formula. Mom has made an appointment with a pediatric opthalmalogist next month and next week, if it doesn't snow, I'm supposed to see a pediatric cardiologist in Cincinnati.

A big thank you goes out to everyone who has followed my Mom's journey to China and back. Now that I'm home she probably won't keep this blog so up to date.

Flying out at 8AM!

Well, we swore Sweetiepie in at the US Consulate today...time to go home! I am dreading the flight so much, but we have to do it of course. Guangzhou has been very good to us - especially our guide, Kathy. We can't say enough good things about her and our agency. Everything has gone so very smoothly, here. I have explored much more of the island this time than I did four years ago. I think the shops can't last forever, here. The island is now a hot spot for wedding photography and wedding dinners. Kathy said many families are staying closer to where the US Consulate is (it moved off Shamian Island a couple of years ago), and the shops can't make it here w/out adoptive families to cater to. It is so sad to see that things will change here, but I know in reality it hasn't been this way on this island for very long.

Sweetiepie is so active now! She can't wait to walk. I am sure she will be standing up on her own very soon. She couldn't even sit up when we got her! It is amazing how much good nutrition and adult interaction can improve a child. :) I wish I could show how happy she is in pictures, but she always smiles AFTER the snapshot.

We were asked by a shopkeeper today "What is wrong with her" and then the shopkeeper laughed. I thought she meant Sweetiepie's rash, but she meant her eyes being crossed. She kept laughing at her. It bothered me so much! How could someone laugh at a wonderful little baby - especially when they are trying to get me to buy something...it was rather surprising and sad at the same time. I hope she didn't mean it the way it sounded, but who knows?

We can't wait to eat some good home cooking and see everyone we've missed so much! Please think good thoughts in our direction as we fly for so very long starting early tomorrow. :)

Just one more day!

Well, tomorrow (Wednesday) is our last day here in Guangzhou. I seem to have a bit of a cold/virus, but I'm OK. My stomach is better this evening but I have some cold symptoms. Not too bad - just aggravating. Sweetiepie is trying to stand up all the time. Her rash is much better. We did the red couch pictures, today, at the famous White Swan hotel. We found out Sweetiepie loves angel food cake, today. The other day we got to go to a tea house and sample all sorts of teas in a tea ceremony - it was so cool! We also went to th Six Banyan temple and had Cheerful Phoenix blessed - it was very different from when we went to a Buddhist temple in Nanning four years ago. I think I have bought out most of the tourist shops here on Shamian Island! Lots of good deals to be had this close to Chinese New Year. There is a Subway restaurant right next to our hotel and also a convenient store, so we have fast food and snacks/water/pop easily obtained. We are likely to stay up late tonight watching the Inauguration! Today was our Consulate appointment but our guide did that for us. Tomorrow will be the swearing in ceremony at the Consulate. Today we met a couple from Hazard...we couldn't believe it. Some bad news - our wonderful adoption agency (Heritage Adoption Services) is closing next month! I hated to hear that so much! They have been wonderful!